I have been diagnosed with "cochlear hydrops," which means there's a wee bit of fluid in my inner ear which leads to a persistent sense of "ear fullness" (i.e., how your ears feel when you ascend in altitude just before they pop) and of very mild dizziness. Since I enjoy neither of these symptoms, I am on the only known treatment (which is 40% effective, yay!), which aims to reduce said fluid by the use of diuretics, a low-sodium diet, and avoiding caffeine; this last because caffeine can reduce the vascular flow which might enable the fluid to pass out of my inner ear.

For once, your tax dollars are spent on a good cause: vindicating my dubious lifestyle choices. Thanks, federal government!
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